another day on the road
another night alone
thoughts gnaw at my soul
like a virus in a hard drive
swirling disconnected bytes
of memory and lessons
garbled in over-heated
silicon gray-mattered slices

I embrace the remote
plugged into a network
but can’t lose myself
in the brainwashing,
sleep won’t cooperate
so I lie silently to myself
aching in naked darkness

greeted by an overcast dawn
as stabs of cold, damp air
penetrate a walking corpse
piercing holes in my conscience
too small to free the demons

obsessed with lost love
and missed opportunities,
I rub the ridged scars
and try to forget myself
in mindless, menial tasks
and an odd occupation
entertaining the masses
who perpetuate my existence

smiling and bullshitting
through moments, hours, days
to the week’s whimpering end
I find myself in a foreign place
I used to call home sweet home
at a mile marker called Sunday

watching “saved” people pray
to phantoms of their guilt,
fears, and helplessness
sacrificing possessions
and visions of grandeur
to fill self-imposed vacuums
leads me to conclude…
my world’s an illusion
 

Boulder, Colorado ‘14